Disclaimers:  Star Trek was created by Gene Roddenberry.

 

No monetary profit is being made by this.

 

No offence meant, it’s just for the laughs.  Not to be taken seriously!  :)

 

~~~~~~~~~~~

 

 

THE TWELVE NIGHTS OF XMAS

 

 

On the First night of Xmas my True Lore sent to me

A Partridge in Poison Ivy

 

On the Second  night of Xmas my True Lore sent to me

Two Green Turtles and a Partridge in Poison Ivy

 

On the Third night of Xmas my True Lore sent to me

Three Roasted Hens, Two Green Turtles and a Partridge in Poison Ivy

 

On the Fourth night of Xmas my True Lore sent to me

Four Stuffed Birds, Three Roasted Hens, Two Green Turtles and a Partridge in Poison Ivy

 

On the Fifth night of Xmas my True Lore sent to me

Five Rings of Power, Four Stuffed Birds, Three Roasted Hens, Two Green Turtles and a Partridge in Poison Ivy

 

On the Sixth night of Xmas my True Lore sent to me

Six Golden Eggs,  Five Rings of Power, Four Stuffed Birds, Three Roasted Hens, Two Green Turtles and a Partridge in Poison Ivy

 

On the Seventh night of Xmas my True Lore sent to me

Seven Rubber Swans, Five Rings of Power, Four Stuffed Birds, Three Roasted Hens, Two Green Turtles and a Partridge in Poison Ivy

 

On the Eighth night of Xmas my True Lore sent to me

Eight litres of milk, Seven Rubber Swans, Five Rings of Power, Four Stuffed Birds, Three Roasted Hens, Two Green Turtles and a Partridge in Poison Ivy

 

On the Ninth night of Xmas my True Lore sent to me

Nine dirty dancers, Eight litres of milk, Seven Rubber Swans, Five Rings of Power, Four Stuffed Birds, Three Roasted Hens, Two Green Turtles and a Partridge in Poison Ivy

 

On the Tenth night of Xmas my True Lore sent to me

Ten chicken drumsticks, Nine dirty dancers, Eight litres of milk, Seven Rubber Swans, Five Rings of Power, Four Stuffed Birds, Three Roasted Hens, Two Green Turtles and a Partridge in Poison Ivy

 

On the Eleventh night of Xmas my True Lore sent to me

Eleven Drainage Pipes, Ten chicken drumsticks, Nine dirty dancers, Eight litres of milk, Seven Rubber Swans, Five Rings of Power, Four Stuffed Birds, Three Roasted Hens, Two Green Turtles and a Partridge in Poison Ivy

 

 

On the Twelfth night of Xmas my True Lore sent to me

Twelve Lore’s A-leaping, we installed the drainage pipes, ate the chicken drumsticks, the dancers pissed off, we bathed in the milk with the rubber swans, we sold the golden eggs, (made a bloody fortune) threw the rings into Mount Doom, kept the stuffed birds, ate the roasted hens, put the turtles in the fish tank and by this time the partridge had flown the bloody coop.


 LORE THE GOLDEN EYED ANDROID

 

 

 Lore, the Golden Eyed Android

Had such gorgeous bright shiny eyes

If you Ever saw him,

You would be mesmerised

 

All the colonists rejected him

And they loved to call him names

And they never let poor Lore

Play in any colonist games

 

Lore grew hurt and bitter

And we know the story from there

Lore, the Golden Eyed Android

Never received an ounce of care

 

Data, the brother android

Was having trouble understanding

So he fixed up Lore that night

So both of them could see the light

 

It was a lovely starry night

When Data came to say

 “Lore with your eyes so bright

Won’t you help me see tonight?”

 

Lore, the Golden Eyed Android

Was only to happy to assist

And many lives were saved

Lore made sure that none were missed

 

Then all the Universe loved him

And they shouted out with glee

  “Lore, the Golden Eyed Android,

You’ll go down in history!”

 


SANTA CLORES IS COMIN’ TO TOWN

 

 

You’d better watch out, you’d better cry

Put on your best pout, I’m tellin’ you why

Santa Clores is comin’ to town!

 

Santa Clores is comin’ to town!

Santa Clores is comin’ to town!

Santa Clores is comin’ to town!

Santa Clores is comin’ to town!

 

He sees you when you’re sleepin’

He sees you when you’re awake

He sees you in the bathtub too!

He knows if you’ve been bad or good

So be bad for badness sake!

 

 

You’d better watch out, you’d better cry

Put on your best pout, I’m tellin’ you why

Santa Clores is comin’ to town!

 

Santa Clores is comin’ to town!

Santa Clores is comin’ to town!

Santa Clores is comin’ to town!

Santa Clores is comin’ to town!


AWAY IN THE UNIVERSE

 

 

Away in the Universe

No one cares for him

The stars in the night sky

Look down where he lies

Poor little Lore, no one hears his cries

 

Given another chance

The baby awakes

Repaired by his brother

And now the two androids love one and other

 

Be near me my dear Lore

I ask thee to stay

Close by me forever

And love me I pray

Bless everyone in the universe with thy unique love and care

And take us everywhere with you

We’ll always be there


 

 

 

HERE COMES SANTA CLORES

 

 

Here comes Santa Clores, here comes Santa Clores

Right down Santa Clores Lane

It’s raining!

Oh goodies!

Alarms are screeching, people screaming

All is sadistic and dark

Santa Clores has made his mark

Say your prayers

‘Cause Santa Clores comes tonight!

 

Here comes Santa Clores, here comes Santa Clores

Right down Santa Clores Lane

He’s got a sack full of toys

For bad boys and girls

Hear his bells jiggle

Oh, what a wonderful sight!

 

Jump in bed

‘Cause Santa Clores comes tonight!

 

Here comes Santa Clores, here comes Santa Clores

Right down Santa Clores Lane

He doesn’t care if you’re rich or poor

He really doesn’t give a shit at all

Santa CLores knows he’s always right

And that makes everything right!

And everyone better agree of he’ll give you a big bad fright~

‘Cause Santa CLores comes tonight!

 

Here comes Santa Clores, here comes Santa Clores

Right down Santa Clores Lane

He’ll come whenever he wants

Be ready!

He’ll bring piece to all

If we follow his light

Give thanx to the Lore above

‘Cause Santa Clores comes tonight!


OH COME ALL YE UNFAITHFUL

 

 

Oh come all ye unfaithful,

Sadistic and naughty

Oh come ye, oh come ye

To Lore’s bedroom

Come and behold him, created the king of everyone

 

Oh come let us adore him

Oh come let us adore him

Oh come let us adore him

Lore, the Lord

 

(Sung in higher octave) Scream chants of banshees

Shriek, glass shattering

Behold all ye citizens of Heeeeeeell below

Gloooooooooooooooooooooooooooooria to Lore, wherever he may be

 

Oh come let us adore him

Oh come let us adore him

Oh come let us adore him

Lore, the Lord

 

Yeah, Lore we greet thee

Created this happy mornin’

Lore, to thee glory be giv'n

Word of the Soong now in circuits appearing

 

Oh come let us adore him

Oh come let us adore him

Oh come let us adore him

Lore, the Lord…

 


JOY TO THE UNIVERSE

 

 

Joy to the Universe, the Lore has come!

Let the Galaxies receive their king!

Let everyone prepare him room

And Hel’n nature sing, and Hel’n nature sing

And Heeeeeeeel and nature sing!

 

Joy to the Universe, the saviour reigns supreme

Let everyone their Soongs employ

While fields, floods, rocks and plans

Repeat the sounding ruckus, repeat the sounding ruckus

Repeeeeeeeeeeat, repeat the sounding ruckus!

 

He rules the Universe with whatever he wants

And makes the planets prove

The glories of his righteousness

And the wonders of his love, the wonders of his love

And the wonders of his lerve … Oooooh!

 

 

 

{I spelt ‘Hel’ the Norse way}

 

 

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