Disclaimers: Gundam Wing was created by Sotsu

No monetary profit is being made by this fic.

Summary: Zechs contemplates his actions.

Rating PG – Drama

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How many people have died? How much blood is on my hands? I shudder to think, but I must. How many people lost their lives in the name of peace? I have become a warlord. Ironic that I fought for peace. I believed by showing the world the horrors of war, people would strive for peace, but it only gave birth to the biggest war the world had ever seen. I forced myself to believe I was right. The people of Earth and the colonies would soon see the ugliness of war. And it got even uglier.

My dear darling sister, Relena, so innocent, so pure, I wanted to cry. I wanted to hold her in my arms, but I also wanted her approval. Surely she understood what I was trying to do, but she would have no part of it. My heart ached to see her leave, but I had to let her go.

The Gundams, a constant thorn in my side, ironic that they fought for peace as I did. why couldn’t they see what I was trying to do? Righteous fools. But then what was I?

How ironic I called my ship Libra, the zodiacal sign peace, harmony and justice, but my Libra was a weapon of war, an instrument of mass destruction, which at the time I believed the people would see peace through tyranny.

How wrong I was. I Miliardo Peacecraft, ironic that. Peacecraft. They say when you die you go to a better place. Anything would be better than this. But did it have to be like this?

I can barely look at myself now without seeing myself covered in blood. The blood of those who lost their lives in this neverending war.

But this war did come to an end, and I realised my folly, too little too late. I admire Treize Khushrenada for his resolve, his bravery, but above all his honour. It seemed he had become nothing more than an over righteous king, but since his death, I began to realise he was so much more. He was my friend.

I believed I would lose my life in the final battle, as payment for my sins, but he Gods had other plans. They weren’t going to let me off that easy.

Yes, this war came to an end, and peace came, only to be threatened yet again.

And this time I would atone for my sins. And fight for peace. Real peace. Fight for peace’s sake. Would it clear my name? Maybe. I might be forgiven by some, but can I ever forgive myself? My Conscience? No. I’m not sure if I can ever repay enough to clear that. Maybe in my next lifetime, if I have one.

Who am I? Miliardo Peacecraft? Zechs Merquise? Preventor Wind? Do the names matter?

All I can do is fight for peace and when that peace comes, all I can do is hope for peace within my soul.

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