Disclaimer: The Ebenezum~Wuntvor saga was written by Craig Shaw Gardner and I suggest you read it, it's hilariously funny that I'm quite happy I found by accident and thoroughly enjoyed this Malady of Magicks!

I make no monetary profit from this story.

Summary - Read on ... Or sing along!

Rating G

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THE BALLAD OF WUNTVOR

(To the tune of 'The Ballad of Joxer the Mighty' from Xena)

Wuntvor, Ebenezum's student

Into the face of Darkness he went

Now here's a tale we must tell

He survived a night in the Netherhells

With Hendrek his largish friend

Doom! Doom! This evil must end!

And with Cuthbert, his Magic Sword

Wuntvor can't be ignored

He's mighty brave or terrified

For he may be fried alive

But he came shining through

The ghastly, horrible awful goo

Yes he did, the awkward brave kid!

A strange one for sure he is

He never eats any chicken

Even when it's finger lickin'

Norei and Alea both want him

He's so adorable, it's a sin!

He's a thorn in Death's side

So Death paces and bides his time

He's Wuntvor, Ebenezum's apprentice

He's Wuntvor, Ebenezum's charge

He's Wuntvor!

He's Wuntie!

He's our Mage!

*

THREE CHEERS FOR WUNTVOR!

HIP! RAY!

HIP! RAY!

HIP! RAY!

FOR HE'S A JOLLY GOOD FELLOW!!!

Give me a W! - W!

Give me a U! - U!

Give me an N! - N!

Give me a T! - T!

Give me a V! - V!

Give me an O! - O!

Give me an R! - R!

What does it spell?!

... Eerr ... WUNTVOR?

*Grabs purple & Green Pom Poms...*

Wuntvor! Wuntvor!

We love you!!

Wuntvor! Wuntvor!

Sure we do!!

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Joxer the Mighty Tune:

Original version:

Joxer the Mighty...
Roams through the countryside
He never needs a place to hide
With Gabby as his sidekick
Fighting with her little stick
Righting wrongs and singing songs
Being mighty all day long
He's Joxer ... he's Joxer the Mighty!
Ooh ohhhhhh....
He's Joxer the Mighty
He's really tidy
Everybody likes him
'Cause he has a funny grin
Joxer...
Joxer the Mighty!

Joxer the Mighty...
He's very tidy
Everyone admires him
He's so handsome it's a sin
When you’re in jeopardy
Don't call the cavalry
There's a better remedy
Although he doesn't work for free
He's every man's trustee,
He's every woman's fantasy,
Plus he's go-od company
He's Joxer...
I'm Joxer the Mighty!

Blood—valour—and victory! HA-HA!
Joxer the Mighty...
He's very tidy
Everyone admires him
He's so handsome it's a sin
When things get grim
He'll take it on the chin
If you're in jeopardy
Caught by the enemy
Don't call the cavalry
There's a better remedy
Although he doesn't work for free...
He's every man's trustee,
He's every woman's fantasy,
Plus he's go-od company
Look out! He's Joxer--
Joxer the Mighty!
Joxer the Mighty!!!!

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Disclaimer II: Xena (And Joxer ;) created by Rob Tapert. You Bastard. Bring back Hades.

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